I just finished installing a new CPU heatsink on my desktop PC; a new-in-box Be Quiet! Dark Rock 4 I got a good deal on from a reseller on r/HardwareSwap. It’s an excellent heatsink, especially considering how excessive it is for my Ryzen 5 2600X CPU (I’m essentially passively cooling my PC!). Now, I could review the Dark Rock 4 as I have other products; highlighting its pros and cons, assessing it’s price-point, and elaborating on why it is (or isn’t) a good fit for my needs. But ultimately, that wouldn’t fully explain why I bought it. My stock AMD Wraith CPU cooler was more than sufficient, and I certainly didn’t need to burn $55. What I needed was a project; some mechanical task I could do with my hands. What I needed was a sense that even through all this uncertainty and chaos, there was something in my life that I could disassemble and rebuild as better than it was before.
I’ve been exclusively working from home since the first week of March due to the COVID-19 pandemic that quite nearly everyone has been affected by. Transitioning to 100% work from home has been challenging, mostly in the area of keeping myself sane. I’m spoiled to have a job where there is plenty for us to be doing from the safety of our homes, I’m spoiled to have a desk with a computer where I can do that work from, and I am spoiled to have a wife and a dog to keep my home feeling like home through all of this mess. Many reading this may be more spoiled, and some perhaps less — regardless, home isolation, perpetually bleak news, and the creeping anxiety caused by a global virus outbreak can really take a toll on one’s mental health.
I’ve had productive days, and I’ve certainly had unproductive ones too; but one thing that I’ve noticed (now, as well as during other stressful times in my life) is that I periodically need a tactile project to clear my mind and calm my spirit. Most often this need is satisfied by working in my wood shop (which I am also incredibly spoiled to have) — today, it was the anticipation of receiving the CPU heatsink I carefully selected and hunted for a deal on, the process of delicately affixing it to my PC’s motherboard, and the fine-tuning of fan RPM curves to quiet the noise my computer makes as much as possible.
“You aren’t working from home — you are at home during a crisis trying to work.” - Unknown
The unnecessary purchase of and frivolous fiddling with a computer part may seem both wasteful and trivial, but in these unusual times it also meant much more to my sanity than the money or time it “cost” me. You probably have a hobby or interest that may feel much the same — lean into it. If spending a little extra money on a high-quality calligraphy set, a handsome piece of figured walnut, a Nintendo Switch, or a CPU heatsink is what it takes to give you a sense of normalcy and safeguard your mental health, do so. There’s an excellent quote circulating on Twitter lately: “You aren’t working from home — you are at home during a crisis trying to work.” Your first priority should be you and your family’s physical and mental health. Much has been said about the former — don’t neglect the latter. Find what brings you joy when things are hard. Reference good resources (like IsolatedNotAlone.com). Consider what little things you can do to settle your mind the next time anxiety over world events takes hold, or what gift you can give to yourself or a loved one to brighten an otherwise gloomy day. Because we all sometimes need “bulwarks against madness...museums against entropy.”